Help Please

Alright. I know I've been away forever now. It's sad how people get too wrapped up in trying to support a life with the hope that at some point there might be some quality to it... I need some cyber help. Really. My best friend who is five months pregnant has just been told that her baby has downs syndrome....bad enough that the chance of survival beyond two years of age is slim...and she has decided to terminate the pregnancy. She tells me with hardly even a hitch in her voice that she will have to endure an actual labour. She will have to give birth to the baby that will be alive when he - she knows it's a he - is born. He will absloutely die within moments of coming into the world. She most likely won't hear him cry...but she might. She tells me this story very matter of fact...and while I know how strong she is....and how much I know she wants me to believe that she will be okay....her voice is raw like she had been crying for days on end. I have no idea at all what to do for her. Anyone have any idea as to what an outsider is supposed to do for someone going through something like this? She has overwhelming amounts of support - I know that she will be surrounded by incredibly supportive family and friends - do I go to her anyways? Do I hang back and help pick up the pieces when everyone else goes home? Would that make it worse? I would like to get her a card....is there a "gee don't know what else to say but that must really suck" card? Is there an appropriate gift? I hate sending flowers....they die. I think it's so bizarre that society sends flowers for every occasion when they are the starkest reminder of our own mortality. What can I do for her so that she knows how much my heart is breaking for her? Anyone? Is there anyone out there?